Dear Readers,
One almost feels embarrassed to be cheerful in the midst of the horrifying revelations about Planned Parenthood this summer and the other almost daily atrocities of the culture of death. But the temptation to discouragement and despondency is one of the devil’s most insidious weapons. We need to remember God loves us to rejoice in the true, the good, and the beautiful, and, even in the blackest of times, God’s goodness must fill our hearts with joy.
I recently read a description of Dietrich von Hildebrand, the German philosopher described by Pope Pius XII as a 20th century Doctor of the Church. He unrelentingly fought the Nazis during their early rise recognizing their evil from the very beginning. Ultimately, stripped of his property and fleeing for his life with his family, von Hildebrand arrived in America an impoverished refugee. And yet this man, raised in luxury and privilege amongst the elite, reduced to living in a shabby apartment with holes in his shoes and threadbare clothes was described by a professor friend saying, “I had never in my life met someone so happy. I did not realize it was possible to be so happy.” And why? Because he loved God, loved the Catholic Church, loved his family and took pleasure in the beauty of life even at its most difficult. With a particular gift for friendship, his home was a gathering spot for truth seekers. And how many came to the truth and the fullness of the faith through his teaching and that of his second wife, Alice, who taught Philosophy at Hunter College.
God wants us to be happy. One of the first questions in the old Baltimore catechism is Why did God make me? To know Him, love Him, and serve Him in this world and be happy with Him in the next. But it isn’t only in the next world God wants us to be happy. Remember when Jesus said, “The reign of God is already in your midst.”If God is reigning in our midst, if we live continually in His presence, how can we not be happy?
In view of that, what makes you happiest? I can answer in one word: family, especially grandchildren. God blessed my husband and me with eleven grandsons and 12 granddaughters (so far) plus two “adopted” granddaughters from the Fresh Air Fund who visit us in the summer for a week. We’ve seen our grandchildren so much lately, it truly has been a happy time despite being mixed with sadness. Several serious illnesses and the sudden death of one daughter’s father-in-law mixed tears of sorrow with our joy.
“It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness
and pain of someone unloved in our own home.
Bring love into your home for this is where our love for each other must start.”
St. Teresa of Calcutta
But when I reflect on the funeral, what it illustrated was the closeness and joy of family life. Memories shared of my daughter’s father-in-law, Larry, weren’t about work and worldly success. Everyone reminisced about the happiness of spending time with dad/grandpa: doing projects around the house, building cars for the Scouts’ Pinewood Derby, grandpa cheering at swim meets and sporting events, joining our daughter’s family for two fun vacations to Disney World. Every memory echoed family.
Meanwhile, family photos looped on huge TV screens at either end of the “chapel” showing Larry at weddings, graduations, on vacations and camping trips, holding newborns, eating meals with loved ones, celebrating anniversaries, etc. And tucked into corners and on tables in every room of the funeral home were lilies from Larry’s garden – white, yellow, pink, orange, plain petals or ruffled and double-petaled – all beautiful, many of them unique, grafted by him to create new varieties. I have the progeny of Larry’s lilies in my own garden, a joyful remembrance of him whenever I pass them.
Death has a way of emphasizing what’s important in life, the true source of happiness. For Larry it was obviously family and I couldn’t agree more. What brings me joy are two young grandsons camping with us and learning how to cast in a fishpond and actually reel in a couple of “big” ones or two little granddaughters waiting at the door for Gramma and Paka to get there for a birthday dinner. I love riding the littlest ones on Gramma’s “horsie” and singing the special songs I made up for them, or listening to a new reader struggle through a story. Time stands still and stretches out.
One of my favorite happy times this summer was a swim party and bonfire with two of our children and their families along with our two Fresh Air “granddaughters.” I sat at the campfire holding the newest grandbaby, four-month old Charlie, watching the Frisbee toss and horseshoe game and praying for Zack who was up a tall pine tree about 30 feet from the ground. Would he make it down safely? Of course! Each one of these children is so uniquely special and so close to my heart.
Later, after clean up, we gathered in the “family room” for night prayers and a decade of the rosary, I knew as I looked at the sweet, tired faces it was not only my happiness, but one shared by the Holy Family. I hugged children and gave good night blessings recalling Charles Dickens’ quote, “It is no small wonder that these who are so fresh from God love us,” A happy Amen to that!